We’ve all been there. That terrible time when we have to say goodbye.
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love”. ~ Washington Irving
“It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life, gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are.” ~Unknown
Dodo has a lovely collection of first and last photos of beloved pets. Perhaps doing something like this would be one small thing you can do in your grieving process. We have other ideas as well.
I Remember
I stood by your bed last night. I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
“It’s me, I haven’t left you, I’m well, I’m fine, I’m here.”
I was close to you at breakfast. I watched you pour the tea.
You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels ~ I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today. You tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you that I’m not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you. I smiled and said “It’s me.”
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.
It’s possible for me to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, “I never went away.”
You sat there very quietly, then smiled. I think you knew ~
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over ~ I smile and watch you yawning,
and say “Good-night, God bless, I’ll see you in the morning.”
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I’ll rush across to greet you and we’ll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out ~ then come home to be with me.
— Author unknown
Pet Loss Support Hotlines
Cummings School of Veterinary Medicine at Tufts University (508) 839-7966 M-F 6 to 9pm
The ASPCA (877) 474-3310 Seven days a week
Websites That Offer Pet Loss Support
Tufts Veterinary Pet Loss Support Hotline
Dogtime Dog Grief Archives
Psych Central Grieving the Loss of a Pet
Association of Pet Loss and Bereavement
AHA Activities for Grieving Children
Pet Loss Grief Support Coloring Book for Kids
Pet Loss www.petloss.com
Rainbow Bridge and Pet Loss
HSUS Coping with Death of a Pet
Animal Hospices and Sanctuaries
Caring for Old, Sick or Dying Dogs
Grief Healing article on Guilt in the Wake of the Euthanasia Decision
Links to a variety of artists for memorial keepsakes
BarkPost 11 Ways To Honor Your Dog’s Memory When They Pass
Dogster article on pet loss
Matters of Love and Death article
“I Couldn’t Save You”
“I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you, Though I tried with all my might. The darkness came so swiftly, And I couldn’t find the light. I would have traded all my tomorrows, To rewrite that fateful day. But time is a cruel master, That steals what it won’t replay. You slipped through my fingers, Like sand in the crashing tide. And now I’m left with the silence, And the ache I cannot hide. If love alone could save you, You’d still be here, I know. But now I carry your memory, Everywhere I go.”
Reading for Adults
Guide to Pet Loss Resources, 3rd Edition. Davis C. Anderson.
Victoria, BC: Trafford, 2005.
Marty Becker.
New York: Hyperion, 2002.
Sandwich, Massachusetts: Bestsell Publications, 2000.
Robin Jean Brown.
Lulu Press, Morrisville, North Carolina, 2005.
Jack Canfield (Editor), et al.
Health Communications, Deerfield Beach, Florida, 1998.
Augsburg Fortress Press, Minneapolis, 2002.
Joan Coleman.
J.C. Tara Enterprises, Inc., Las Vegas, Nevada, 1993.
Melba Colgrove, et al.
Prelude Press, Los Angeles, 1991.
Peggy Haymes, Susan Lautemann.
Winston-Salem, North Carolina: Kalalogos, 2003.
Pasadena, California: Darrowby Press, 1998.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Virginia Ironside.
Robson Books, London, 1994.
Healy House Books, 2009
Julie Kaufman, D.C., C.A.C.
Xenophon Publications, Cottage Grove, Wisconsin, 1999.
Christina M. Lemieux.
Reading, Pennsylvania, Wallace R. Clark Publishers, 1988.
Cheryl A. Matschek.
Albuquerque, New Mexico: Princess Pub, 1998.
Indianapolis, Indiana: Noel Studio, 1996.
Marsha Olson.
Fairview Press, May 2003.
Robert S. Pasick.
Chicago: Transitions Bookplace, 2000.
Polaire Publications, 2005.
Diane Pomerance, Ph.D.; Illustrated by Trey Wright
Polaire Publications, 2006.
Blessing the Bridge: What Animals Teach Us About Death, Dying and Beyond. Rita M. Reynolds.
NewSage Press, August 2000.
Lulu.com, 2011
Transitions (Jonathan Rudinger)
When Only Love Remains: The Pain of Pet Loss (Emily Sturparyk)
Marty Tousley & Katherine Heuerman.
Our Pals Publishing Co., Phoenix, Arizona, 1997. Out of print. Limited availability.
George and Emily Watson.
PMD Publishing, Salt Lake City, Utah, 2000.
Cheryl Reneé Webb.
Ortonville, Michigan: BriteBooks, 2002.
Cheryl Underhill, M. Ed., LPC.
Geadon’s Gift Publications, 1997.
Veterinary Practice Publishing Co., Santa Barbara, California, 1994.
Out of print. Not available.
Kymberly Smith.
Philadelphia: Charles Press Publisher, 1997.
Kaetheryn Walker.
Healing Arts Press, Rochester, Vermont, 1999.
Maria L. Quintana, et al.
Mariposa Press, Perrysburg, Ohio, 2000.
Deborah Antinori.
Yoko Spirit Publications, Basking Ridge, New Jersey, 2000.
J. Church.
Tiburon, California, 1987.
Shannon Fujimoto Nakaya.
New World Library, 2005.
Eugene O’Neill.
Henry Holt & Company, Inc., 1999 (reprint).
Teresa L. Wagner, Maxine Musgrave.
1998.
Bob Deits.
Fisher Books, Tucson, Arizona, 1992.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Mickie Gustafson.
Bergh Publishing, New York, 1991.
Michael Stern and Susan Cropper.
Jason Aronson Inc., Northvale, New Jersey, 1998.
Martin Kosins.
Open Sky Books, Royal Oaks, Michigan, 1992.
Caroline Knapp.
Broadway Books, New York, 1999.
James L. McClinton, Ph.D.Lincoln, Nebraska: iUniverse, Inc., 2004
Cheri Barton Ross, et al.
Brunner-Routledge, 2007.
Pet Parents: A Journey Through Unconditional Love And Grief Coleen Ellis, iUniverse Publishing, 2011
Laynee Gilbert.
L.O.A. Publications, 2007.
Myrna M. Milani.
Prima Publishing, Rocklin, California, 1998.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Lorri Greene and Jacquelyn Landis.
Shelby’s Grace: From Abused Pup to Angel of Mercy [Kindle Edition] Joe Dwyer.
Perennial Press Publishing LLC, 2010
Susan Kelleher, Rod Lawrence.
Silverthrone, Colorado: Owl of Athene Press, 1998.
Linda Peterson, editor.
Greentree Publishing, West Chester, Pennsylvania, 1997.
David Congalton.
NewSage Press, Troutdale, Oregon, 2000.
When Only the Love Remains: The Pain of Pet Loss. Emily Stuparyk.
Winnipeg, Canada: Stuparyk Publishing, 1998
Joel Gavriele-Gold, Ph.D.
Hoboken, New Jersey: Howell Book House, 2000
Jamie Quackenbush & Denise Graveline.
New York: Simon & Schuster, 1985.
Mary Buddemeyer-Porter.
Manchester, Missouri: Eden Publications, 1995
Pyschology of Loss
Barnell & Barnell
New York, Hamm Sciences Press, 1989.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.
Englewood Cliffs, NJ, Simon & Schuster, 1986.
William Piper, et al
New York, The Guildford Press, 1992.
Wallace Sife, Ph.D.
New York: Howell Book House, 2014. Readers of this book were the founding members of the APLB. It is now being used as the basis for all our counselor training. Please ask for this newly revised and expanded Fourth Edition.
J.W. Worden
New York, Springer Publishing Company, 1991.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Harriet Sarnoff Schiff
New York, Viking Penguin, 1986.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Alpine Publications Inc., Loveland, CO, 1996. Out of print. Limited availability.
David Dietrich, et al
International Universities Press, Inc. 1989.
Kristin Madden
St. Paul, Minnesota: Llewellyn Publications, 1999
J. Tatelbaum.
New York: Harper & Row, 1989.
John James.
Harper Collins, New York, 1988.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Reading for Children
About:
Death of a Pet: Answers to Questions for Children and Animal Lovers of All Ages.
J. Potter, Jr. and George Koss.
Guideline Publications, Stamford, New York, 1991.
Children Who Grieve: A Manual for Conducting Support Groups .
Roberta Beckmann, Holmes Beach, FL, Learning Publications, Inc., 1990.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Bereaved Children and Teens: A Support Guide for Parents and Professionals. Earl Grollman. Beacon Press,1995
Boston, Beacon Press, 1985.
The Harvard Common Press, MA, 1982.
Harper & Row, New York, 1982, 1996.
New York: Brunner-Routledge, 2005.
Children and Pet Loss: A Guide for Helping . Marty Tousley
Scottsdale, Arizona, Companion
Fred Rogers.
New York: Putnam Publishing Group, 1998.
John W. James, Russell Friedman.
London: Perennial, 2002.
Brian Mellonie & Robert Ingpen
New York, Bantam Books, Inc, 1983.
Linda Makkay (Author), Marlene Hingstman (Illustrator).
Beaver’s Pond Press (August 29, 2007)
William VanderWyden,
Tabor, 1991.
Out of print. Limited availability.
When Your Pet Dies: Dealing with Your Grief and Helping Your Children Cope.
Christine Adamec.
The Berkley Publishing Group, New York, 1996.
Out of print. Limited availability.
For:
Leo Buscaglia
New York: Holt, Rinehart & Winston, 2002.
Debby Moorhead
Broomfield, CO, Partners in Publishing, 1996.
Kimberly A. Cardeccia
Bree’s Gift Publishing, Howell, MI, 2004.
Doris Sanford
Multnomah Press, 1986. December 14, 1997
Out of print. Limited availability.
Francine Patterson
Dr. Scholastic, Inc. Reading Rainbow, 1985.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Munro Leaf
New York, Scholastic Book Services, 1971.
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Warren Hanson
Tristan Publishing, 2008.
Joan Hewett
Lothopp, 1987.
Janus Moncur
Mon Coeur Publishing, LLC; 2007 Edition
Gentle Paws, for the Animal Lover 